Time is right to declare freedom from fan oppression

JENNIFER FLOYD ENGEL

Thomas Jefferson was way too smart for journalism, but he would have made a fine newspaperman nonetheless. The man sure knew how to write a lede.

OK, copy editors would hate him.

His sentences were too long and he randomly capitalized, but genius rarely conforms.

"We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness. That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed."

This, of course, is from the Declaration of Independence, a truly inspiring document of which Jefferson was the primary author 233 years ago. He followed up that genius by asking James Madison to craft a Bill of Rights to the Constitution, enumerating what exactly unalienable rights entail.

And on this Fourth of July, I thought, why not celebrate with our own Declaration of Sports Fan Independence, including a Bill of Rights? So ...

We, the fans of sports in The Great State of Texas, in order to form a more perfect sporting world, establish order, ensure drug-free games, provide for the common enjoyment, promote the general welfare of the sport, and secure the blessings of a lazy Sunday on the couch with a beer and a ballgame to ourselves and our... -- Continue reading at the publisher's site